When Should You NOT Listen To Your Mother? Know If Your Mother Is A Narcissistic


Rookmini Tewari

Family & Parenting

9 Mins Read

February 2, 2024

25 characteristics of a narcissistic mother-min

Are you dealing with such a mom who always puts herself first and will never be for you? Well, this is one of the 25 characteristics of a narcissistic mother. Not only that, but she criticizes you constantly and makes you feel like you will never be able to do anything right. If this happens to you, then it means you might be dealing with a narcissistic mother.

Recently, mothers are considered the epitome of selflessness and pursuing unconditional love with their child/children. After all, there are some exceptions where you can deal with every rule.

Some moms can be the polar opposite of how an ideal mom usually should be. Above all, these types of mothers can make their lives unbearably difficult in terms of destroying their relationships with their families and others. Before heading to the characteristics of a narcissistic mother, you should always be aware of how to be a good mom

25 Characteristics Of A Narcissistic Mother

25 Characteristics Of A Narcissistic Mother

If you are suffering from a mental mom issue, then you have to rely on multiple behavior patterns for this. After all, you also have to look out for some signs that will help you quickly identify how to handle a narcissistic personality woman. Below, I will discuss about 25 Characteristics Of A Narcissistic Mother.

1) She Doesn’t Appreciate Your Personal Boundaries

One of the most common characteristics of a narcissistic mom is not to give respect to your boundaries. Above all, this is one of the most common forms of being abused by your narcissistic parent.

On the other side, this is a hard part in terms of making her realize the mistakes she has made. She even forces her ideas along with views on you. Furthermore, she thinks that invading your personal space would be wrong.

2) She Plays The Role Of A Victim Card

Even if she dominates your life at all times, it doesn’t mean she is not good at twisting things around you and playing the victim. Not only that, but she might have said or even done several terrible things. However, she will take offense at your resistance and portray herself as a victim.

One of the worst parts of a narcissistic mom is that she will do several things knowingly and intentionally. Above all, she will also be good at making you feel triggered or even guilty for her by altering the narrative.

3) She Is Good At Gaslighting

Well, one of the most significant signs of a narcissistic mother is good at gaslighting. Above all, this might make you wonder whether you are going bonkers. Not only that, but you also don’t blame her for gaslighting you, and this is a natural outcome at all.

One of the weapons of narcissistic parents is abuse psychologically. On the other hand, she lies without even batting an eyelid to gaslight you. In particular, she will give you lies about her complications in the same matter.

If required further, she will even pretend that the hurtful words were not meant to be serious. This means they will try to mean that their intentions behind expressing slang language are in a lighter vein.

4) She Won’t Be Consistent In Her Behavior

A narcissistic mom is unpredictable. Above all, her emotions will run wild, creating multiple disruptions. She will be a loving and caring mother at one time, but other times, she will be vicious, vengeful, and scheming. Above all, you won’t be sure where you stand with her at any given time, and this makes a perfect life for you without even facing any difficulty.

While you want something from you, she will become more amicable. Furthermore, she will turn against you several times. You might wrongly believe that your behavior is one of the causes of other wild swings. He even snatches the rights of a biological father to handle his child/children and will show rudeness to him.

5) She Will Tell A Lie Without Any Hesitation

Have you trusted everything that your mom usually said? Well, if not, one of the major reasons for this is to catch her lying every time. Therefore, this is one of the major signs of being a selfish mom.

A narcissistic mother always uses lies and deceitful words to cover her tracks and distract you from being truthful. Their constant endeavor is about managing a project with an unblemished image.  

6) She Is Biased

If you are a selfish mom, then it means she is known to pick her favorite among other children. She will compel the rest of the family members to help, praise, and protect her favorite child, even if they don’t want to.

When her favorite child does wrong, she will cover up and let the child off the hook. Furthermore, her favoritism will give that child all her mother’s love. It is one of the significant signs your mother hates you for this. Above all, a narcissistic mother always wants to get full custody of a child as a mother.

7) She Is Pretty-Minded

Another one of the significant traits of a narcissistic mother is that she is pretty-minded. After all, her pettiness is another common characteristic. She sometimes behaves wrong like a child and fumes over multiple trivial issues. Above all, she will pretend that she is hurt by your mundane words when the language she uses with you is quite a bit caustic.

8) She Destroys Relationships

If you are in her efforts to be the center of attention, then a narcissistic mother will end up ruining your relationships with others. Even a narcissistic mother will always make it difficult for her child to build an amicable relationship with each other.

Above all, a narcissistic mother often plays one child against another for their gain. Not only that, but she will tell lies without making any scruples, which makes it hard for you to trust.

9) She Doesn’t Give Value To Your Opinion

Above all, a narcissistic mother is always so selfish and self-serving. In this case, it becomes hard for you to tolerate different viewpoints. Unless you always agree with her. She will prevent herself from spending all her energy discrediting you and your opinions. Not only that, but she needs to consider the merits of your exceptional ideas.

10) She Will Enjoy Your Pain And Discomfort

If she is your mother, you will automatically expect your mother to defend and protect her against others. Instead of that, she will generally pull you down at every opportunity. One of the best words to describe a narcissistic mom is “Vampire.”

11) A Narcissistic Mother Would Always Be Jealous

A Narcissistic mother’s jealousy can sometimes be a damaging element within the family dynamic. This jealousy of a narcissistic mother often arises from the child’s success and other achievements, which shift attention far away from her. Narcissistic mothers might perceive their children’s accomplishments as threats. This leads them to engage in such destructive behaviors to undermine these types of successes.

12) A Narcissistic Mother Would Always Refuse To Take Responsibility

A Narcissistic mother would always refuse to take responsibility for her children. This behavior stems from her enlarged sense of self in her infallibility. A narcissistic mother always refuses to accept the responsibility in several ways. Narcissistic mothers would constantly shift blame onto others, including their children.

13) This Is An Overly Critical

A narcissistic mother constantly will criticize her child’s appearance and lifestyle choices. This leaves a child feeling inadequate and belittled. Not only that, but she criticizes everything that doesn’t fit her idea.

14) A Narcissistic Mother Always Has Favoritism And Preference

One of the most damaging traits of a narcissistic mother is to display their preference and favoritism. On the other hand, this preferential treatment would range from subtle differences in affection to over-disparities. This divisive strategy can lead to profound resentment, jealousy, and discord among the family members.

15) A Narcissistic Mother Is Always An Aggressive Outburst

One of the most significant traits of a narcissistic mother is to stem from any perceived challenge to their self-image. This leads to a volatile and intense situation involving emotional and harsh words. These types of mothers exhibit a phenomenon which is known as narcissistic rage. This refers to extreme anger and aggression.

16) Lacks Empathy

One of the most common and prominent signs of a narcissistic mother is her lack of empathy. Being a child of a narcissistic mother, you might have felt like your emotions and feelings were validated. In this case, your mother will dismiss or ignore your feelings and leave you feeling invalidated or sometimes unheard.

On the other side, a narcissistic mother even fails to take into consideration their children’s requirements and emotions. This means they may be preoccupied with their wishes along with wants. Even they will leave a little space for their children’s needs.

A narcissistic mother has a lack of empathy, which can be distinct in several ways. She might not care or even understand the feelings for her children. This might become dismissive and angry for her children. Furthermore, she might also use her children’s emotions and make them feel guilty.

17) A Narcissistic Mother Is An Untrustworthy

A narcissistic mother is significantly dishonest, which makes her fundamentally untrustworthy. On the other side, a narcissistic mother always blames her child for their inability to accomplish relationships and finances. The chronic dishonesty of a narcissistic mother makes it difficult for anyone to trust her. At the same time, family members create a barrier of uncertainty and suspicion, making genuine connections almost impossible.

18) Unavailability Is A Significant Significance

A narcissistic mother is all about her emotional unavailability. They often create a crucial disconnect between them and their children. Narcissistic mothers are always so engrossed in their dramas and self-image that they fail to provide the emotional support that their children require. They might ignore attempts at communicating their children’s experiences or respond with irritation while they seek comfort.

19) A Narcissistic Mother Cannot Love Unconditionally

Narcissistic mothers often find this challenging, if not impossible; they would love unconditionally. Their love is transactional and conditional, which includes their children. In this case, they can serve their requirements or inflate their self-images.

20) A Narcissistic Mother Is An Unpredictable

A narcissistic mother might seem supportive and loving, while the next, she could turn into someone you won’t be able to recognize. Above all, this is all about being angry, demanding, and hostile.

21) A Narcissistic Mother Would Always Blame Others

Narcissistic mothers are always about to deflect attention away from their shortcomings and mistakes. A narcissistic mother always manages to avoid shame, inadequacy, and so on. This blame-shifting can easily take several forms, from outright accusations to subtle insinuations.

22) A Narcissistic Mother Has Difficulty With Intimacy

A narcissistic mother faces critical challenges when it comes to forming intimate connections. This has the difficulty of romantic relationships, but this extends to every personal relationship. This includes those with their children.

23) A Narcissistic Mother Refuses To Share Credit

A narcissistic mother is constantly seeking several opportunities to affirm self-perception. They view the sharing credits as an insult, and they can choose instead to monopolize praise and recognition.

24) A Narcissistic Mother Is A Self-Centered

A narcissistic mother is a highly self-centered mother who mainly focuses on themselves. This makes them happier. A narcissistic mother will frequently put her requirements before those of her children.

It means that a narcissistic mother will frequently put her requirements before those of her children. Whether this is about financial gain or personal satisfaction, significant harm might cause long-term or short-term consequences.

25) A Narcissistic Mother Would Always Be Manipulative

There has not been any doubt that a narcissistic mother is manipulative. They can efficiently serve their desires and requirements. The potential consequences for others are involved, especially in their children. One of the most common tactics of a narcissistic mother is all talking like an emotionally blackmailing mother.

In Conclusion

I have discussed 10 characteristics among 25 characteristics of a narcissistic mother above in this article. Well, handling a narcissistic mother is quite tough. In this case, some of the most significant signs of a narcissistic mother are sadistic tendencies, manipulation, and, above all, controlling behavior. Above all, these are the better symptoms of narcissistic abuse. I hope you liked this article. In case you have queries, don’t hesitate to comment below!

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